Berlin needs more crime to be great city
By Till-Ted World
Berlin likes to believe it is the measure of all things in Germany and sometimes anywhere else when it comes to cities, but the metropolis on the Spree River once again is a huge disappointment--the crime here is a scandal.
Interior minister Wolfgang Schaueble released the 2006 statistics for Germany and Berlin was third in crimes registered behind Frankfurt and Hannover, two forgettable places. Frankfurt registered 17.57 crimes per 100,000 residents, Hannover 15.69 and Berlin lagged at 15.030.
Crime dropped 2.4 percent in the capital, and hopes are dwindling that Berlin can ever measure up to real world cities like New York, Paris, London. We just don't have any one here with enough money to shake down. But that can't serve as an excuse--something is wrong in the capital when our only proficient criminals steal bicycles and our only reliable source of violence is leftist punks beating up neo-nazis or vice versa.
Losing to Frankfurt is a shame, but understandable. The financial center's downtown empties out at night as people flee work to the suburbs, leaving the downtrodden behind, which makes it the most American of German cities. That is explanation enough for a high crime rate.
If Gertrude Stein had seen Hannover, she might have said "There is no there there" before wasting it on Oakland. Generally, however, the city doesn't inspire anyone to be that clever.
Throughout Germany there was a 1.4 percent drop in crime, leaving 6.3 million unlawful deeds. Police solved 54.4 percent of them, allowing Schaueble to beam at the cameras: "Germany belongs to the safest countries in the world."
That sounds right--its hard to feel unsafe here unless you are coked out. But German gentility makes Berlin's third place crime record even more pathetic. We can't develop into a hardboiled place worthy of the words "big city" if no one is motivated enough to stage a decent driveby shooting. Our wealth of sidewalk cafes packed with bodies during the summer is second to no city--it should be easy to splatter window panes red with blown brains as your vehicle streaks by.
One can walk the streets at 3 a.m. in Berlin without a fear in the world, but great cities are defined by hordes of messed up people seething at the coldness in the metropolis until they lose it and keep the crime rate impressive. Think Taxi Driver, Naked City. Stories, legends, books, music and films are composed of these things.
Miami didn't really get popular until the drug trade took off. What was your first association with the city? Miami Vice, right? Until then, the city was known as a warm place where old people with rheumatism retired.
Since Germany is a country of perfectionists, many still found worrisome signs in the low crime stats. "Daily brutality alarms politicians and police," was the headline from Der Spiegel.
The respected weekly meant murder and manslaughter dropped nine percent, but attempts rose nine percent. That means Germans still haven't gotten the hang of crime. They should spend more time in the United States or take a crash course in Baghdad, then bring their know-how to Berlin.
Traditionally it's the newcomers at the bottom, the foreigners snubbed by society who have lifted crime to whole new heights in a city, typified by gang killings in Chinese and Italian restaurants. I know many of you here in Berlin are English football thugs, crackheads from Cleveland, on the Russian Mafia payroll, Polish car thieves or Arabs dealing drugs in Veteranen Park. Despite those credentials, however, we just haven't made a dramatic difference in Berlin's crime rate.
We need to redouble our efforts to increase the squalor in Berlin, create human tragedies and make fear on the streets a palpable reality--in short, create sexy legends and for once put places like Rio, Washington and London to shame. We need to show the world we have arrived, that we aren't a city of Mr. Beans.
Conrad Freiberg, chaiman of the police union, said the statistics don't tell the whole story. "More and more often police officers run into uninhibited brutal violence," he said. The day those words ring true is the day Berlin will be on the sure path to greatness.
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